Frolix-8

Gig Blogged #22 - Melt-Banana @ Nottingham Trent University

Melt-Banana @ Sub Bar, Nottingham Trent University, Monday November 14th 2005

Before I start dribbling, I must thank George for getting the tickets and Mr. Damn-You for organising another stupendous event. I knew this was going to be a great gig. Not only because it was Melt-Banana, my personal favourite band in the world at the moment, but because Gilbert was making a big effort to convince us that it would be crap. "The venue’s rubbish. The band will have a bad night. Designer Babies are supporting...." And so on.
First of all the venue was downstairs at Trent Uni – not upstairs as Gilb feared - this being the venue for the infamous Lightning Bolt / Jackie O Motherfucker gig attended by the two Gs where Jackie O wrecked the power. The Sub proved itself a nice little bar, with a nice little gig room to one side.
	Secondly, Designer Babies appeared to have lost their lead screecher and as a consequence were nowhere near as awful as in previous encounters. Still wouldn’t buy anything by them or go to see them headline, however. Main chap is now the guitarist, who doesn’t wear hosiery on his head any more but does still pretend to be American. There are enough genuine Americans around without people role-playing Captain Beefheart’s long-lost, weedy nephew, thank you very much. And electro-box girl - ten out of ten for making your own theremin (or finding a cheap Tandy equivalent) but use it more! Drummer was quite impressive, although it was all a bit self-consciously stream-of-consciousness – if you see what I mean.
	Impatient to help the ‘Babies vacate the stage were the Phil Collins 3 (click link at your own risk), all the way from Brighton. There are a lot of bands in Brighton, obviously, so to stand out you have to do something a bit different. Like call your band the Phil Collins 3 when there are five of you, and dress as parrots. Two bass players do not a good sound make, however, especially if they and the rest of the band are thraping an enthusiastic, fuzzy hell out of their instruments while the lead parrot shouts about greenfly eating someone’s dog. Still, I was entertained by them and their enthusiasm was certainly infectious. And, crucially, they didn’t overstay their welcome.
	I hope you realise that I really mean what I am about to say - anyone who has not heard or seen Melt-Banana are not fully human. I’m not judging you and it’s not meant as a cooler-than-thou insult, so don’t take it personally. It’s just a fact. The band go beyond any mere superlatives I could trot out here – suffice to say that this was not merely a great gig but inspiring and, indeed, life-affirming. Yes, I am fully aware of what I sound like but until you have been to see this band you can’t really understand what I’m talking about. We should all feel very lucky that there are still musicians around who can not only make you stand open-mouthed in wonder and amazement at their technical skill but also produce the sort of happiness previously thought possible only via sex, drink, drugs or the sight of your favourite football team continually winning every trophy imaginable.
	With Yasuko, Rika, Agata and yet another drummer quietly setting up their kit after the Brighton parrots had left the stage, the audience seemed, once again, to be blissfully unaware of what was about to unleash itself upon them. Your merry gigging trio, however, were fizzing with anticipation (I would say we had been since George got the tickets several weeks ago). The set was not much changed from the last time we saw them two years or so ago – a new cover (Devo’s Uncontrollable Urge) notwithstanding – but all this was of no consequence when faced with the full-on, refined-and-honed-razor-sharp mania careering around the room.
	Kicking off with Shield For Your Eyes, A Beast In The Well On Your Hand, Agata’s guitar suddenly cut out after the first verse. Any disappointment was soon dissipated by Rika’s bass thunderings and Yasuko’s knife-hot yelps which suddenly took the spotlight. After some frantic pedal-plugging the guitar roared back into life, not letting up again for a moment.
	I took fifty photos – God knows how, as I was frantically headbanging and stamping throughout. Glorious! I had a rest during the ‘short songs’ section. They did eleven and it took longer for Yasuko to announce each song than it did for the band to play them.
	Now, I fancy that I know how to make an electric guitar produce a lot of odd sounds but Agata’s playing just blew me away. At the end, with the other band members remaining absolutely immobile on stage, he played the Outro For Cell-Scape – which myself and Gilb had previously thought was done on a keyboard or a computer. No – it’s on a Gibson SG, through God-knows-what pedals (I saw a Whammy and a Boss Chorus but there were at least a dozen boxes at his feet – and an iPod on its own little ‘bed’) running into – yes – a Sunn amp and Marshall cab. Just simply mind-bending. I felt as if my brain had been run through a spiritual spin-cycle.
	I’m going to stop now – my cup runneth over, as you can probably tell. If you get the chance of seeing this band (and they’re in Cardiff tonight and Leeds tomorrow, apparently) then YOU MUST GO. If you think you know / care about / love music, then YOU MUST GO. Why are you still reading this rubbish? GO AND GET A TICKET !! NOW !!! I can confidently say that your life will never be the same again – now how many bands can you say that about?

UPDATE - George informs that Mr. Damn-You has confirmed the nationality of the lead Designer Baby - he is Canadian. So a measure of apology is in order from yours truly.

UPDATE - Gilbert The Illusionator dresses for work in tribute to Agata (note the lack of footwear)

UPDATE - There's a review of the 'Banana London Garage gig in 2001 on drownedinsound. Sounds like the chap liked it. No others, though - if you've come here from my bit of shameless plugging then welcome!

UPDATE - Slight report on the Birmingham gig here. Written by a yoof, but never mind.

UPDATE - Thoughts and pics from the Bristol gig here (scroll down a bit).

UPDATE - Best Support Band Name goes to this lot playing on the bill with MxBx in Hull.

UPDATE - Review of Glasgow gig here. Sample quote - "They sound exactly like Melt Banana".

UPDATE - Someone slightly younger than me with their take on the Nottingham gig.

UPDATE - The Stockton-on-Tees gig was a 'Sunday Sonic Meltdown' according to the Beeb.

UPDATE - Ignore the rambling diary, this page has a scan of one of the piccies Yasuko hands out during gigs.

UPDATE - This is majorly good fan site - great pics and he linked to frolix_8 as well! Many thanks, Dave.

UPDATE - The Designer Babies' site now has more pics and video from the gig, here and here.

UPDATE - Below are the rest of my photos from the gig - click for full joy...

A Scanner, More Graphically

Further images from the forthcoming (March 2006 ?) A Scanner Darkly film (garnered from various blogs and sites), and I must say that the more I see of it, the more excited I get! I really hope it's not a let-down. Click piccies below for full joy.

Gig Blogged #21 - Two Choices / Kitty Hudson / Bullets n' Babies / Lethargy @ B'Lo, Brighton

Rock Brighton @ B’Lo, Brighton, Thursday November 3rd 2005

Into what the pink-haired one on Monday night called 'chav territory' to happen upon a 4-band lineup for £4. Now, this could either have been very bad or very good. It ended up being a bit of both. Above ground the venue took the form of a small, oh-so-trendy café (something Brighton is not short of). Below – sorry – b’lo it is the Charlotte lined with aluminium. At first the only positive point was the presence of a pair of lovely Orange amps, and I always enjoy the sound of those cranked up.
	I was in the loos when the first band started, and I really should have stayed there. Their small billboard (maybe they do building work on the side) advertised them as Two Choices. We, the audience, all had two choices while they were playing and we all chose wrongly by staying around for their set. Watching and listening to this band was like being poked by stick that had been removed from a duck’s arse. They made being average an art form. Speaking with the guitarist afterwards (a very personable chap, by the way, but this didn’t change my opinion of the performance), it transpired the band had been going for about eight years. Had they always sounded like a Tesco’s own brand Blink 182, I wondered. "We’re playing up in London," stated the singer, more than once. Given that Brighton looks and behaves like Camden-by-the-Sea that’s hardly a surprise. Not a good start – we wanted our first quids back already.
	Next band Kitty Hudson arrived while the first band were playing, which impressed us immediately, bored as we were with the ‘Choices. What a contrast – the Two Choices set seemed interminable, yet Kitty Hudson ripped through great tune after great tune and suddenly announced their penultimate song after what seemed like ten minutes. All three band members were superb but I must make a special mention of their drummer - John Bonham reincarnated as a girl. If you think female drummers begin and end with Meg White's non-drumming, then you are in for a shock. Awesome. Not sure about some of the lyrics but the energy, attitude and music were all present and correct. Well worth a quid of anybody’s money.
	Mattmoo began loudly deriding the members of Bullets N’ Babies as they set up – particularly their trash / goth guitarist, who was too cool and spindly to stand up straight. I’d seen him as we came in and immediately thought ‘Richard III’. After the glorious roaring thump of Kitty Hudson we were back in plod territory I’m afraid, despite B n’ B making use of the Orange amps. Their veneration of the New York Dolls didn’t get further than their t-shirts, although they were trying; one song was entitled Back Door Bitches, I believe. The band seemed to be enjoying themselves, though but it didn’t transmit – and when Mr. TrashGoth fell over on his back after wantonly knocking a mike stand over, then lay staring at the ceiling like he’d just done three hours at Madison Square Garden rather than half-an-hour in a Brighton cellar, I’m afraid I burst out laughing.  He then went to the decks behind the ‘performance area’ of floor and played The Number of the Beast  (see it-was-fate car park sign photo, taken as we left) followed by London Calling. Hmmm… cheese and chalk? Anyway, I bellowed along as you don’t hear Iron Maiden played in clubs that often.
	Thankfully, final band Lethargy (I think that's what they called themselves - it may have been 'Effigy') made the night’s result a score draw in terms of musical quality. A Burberry-burping bollock brain arrived as they kicked off, taking exception to the band’s fantastic mix of full-on hell-howl metal and Zappa jazz. We were asked by the singer to name a new instrumental track before they played it. "Dave !!" shouted Mattmoo. "Colin !!" I added.  "You’re all a bunch of fucking cunts," opined the baseball-capped spastic, drinking what looked like his own piss. Later, Mattmoo engaged him in conversation – I was mentally preparing myself for a fight at this point – and the scrawny nonce revealed that he studied music. In between his practise at being a pointless toerag, obviously. Anyway, Lethargy were excellent – we couldn’t work out how the singer / howler could get his voice to sound like the very roars of Satan and yet natter quite normally between tracks. Also, ‘tother Lethargy guitarist used to be in an early incarnation of Two Choices, before he was sacked. A lucky escape for him, based on tonight.

Gig Blogged #20 - Wilf / Random Heroes / Apers @ The Free Butt, Brighton

Halloween Punk Horror Spectacular @ The Free Butt, Brighton, Monday 31st Oct 2005

Halloween in Brighton. Scary? Possibly, but Britain doesn’t really ‘do’ Halloween. Unless you’re an annoying brat, of course, but is there any other kind? One such miniature goon approached me in the street as Mattmoo and I recce’d the Lanes in search of giggage – ‘Trick or treat !!’ it bellowed in the time-honoured way of the juvenile semi-delinquent. ‘Boo!’ I responded in the least violent manner I could muster; only to be rebuked by a sack of potatoes sculpted into human form purporting to be the child’s mother. ‘Oh you’re so civil aren’t you?’ this creature spouted – whether to myself or her offspring was unclear. The first pub we tried also suffered a slight invasion by a trio of similar waifs demanding money to pay off the loan on their masks, who were successfully ejected by the extremely sociable barmaid and her pink hair. She advised us to head back towards the Lanes and the Levels in our search for quality entertainment, as the other direction was ‘full of chavs’.
And so to the Free Butt. Yes, we went there because it had a funny name. It also had a gig – a Halloween Punk Horror Spectacular, no less. We gained entrance with our fivers to another great little venue – are you listening, Charlotte / Old Angel people? An old pub in the manner of the said Angel, but with an upstairs bar and comfy sofas. Behind the main bar was a small stage in a small room (or ‘big alcove’ depending on your point of view). The home of punk in Brighton, it would appear. On the down side, drink was more expensive from the main bar (we only discovered this later) – but the staff were more attractive, so you pays your money, etc etc.
Wilf were already playing when we went in, ska’ing for all they were worth. Not much to go on for a review, as I didn’t even get to see them before they finished. It sounded very tight, though, and posters stated they were soon to support the venerable Selecter, and I won’t argue with that. Mattmoo gained a couple of trophies this evening – the first being the ‘longest wait for a pint’ world record – at least ten minutes after ordering. I and two other people got one in before the winsomely bloodstained ladyGoff got it together with the barrel of Miller and her ‘inidividual’ pint-pulling style.
	Then – first band proper – Random Heroes. Think sperm of the Clash fertilising the egg of Supergrass. We’d noticed them as we came in, as they were dressed as Ghostbusters. These outfits rapidly became a liability as the band’s monumental energy meant they had to discard them, piece by piece. Hence Mattmoo’s second trophy of the night – the lead singer’s ‘buster backpack. Humour, punk, attitude and tunes – not a bad combination for a band whose combined age probably equals my inside leg measurement. Mattmoo and I were impressed enough to merch after their set, investing in a couple of their CDs. The only downer is that their guitarist had a Les Paul Junior and hearing it rekindled my not-long-dormant desire for one. Git.
	Last band the Apers were kicking off a European tour this evening, apparently, all the way from merry Holland. A punk of a certain vintage fronted them, together with two much younger, cadaverous Michael Schumachers assisting. Able enough but not nearly as entertaining as the Random Heroes - however this may have been due to constraints on time. The ‘Heroes ripped through their short set but I reckon that’s what they would’ve done anyway – indeed they looked like they weren’t physically capable of any more. The Apers’ leader kept making references to ‘how long we’ve got’ which took the edge off things somewhat. They played for about half an hour in the end to a small but happy and bouncy audience.